Just a few personal conjectures that I would like to share about travelling, beauty, sex, work, immigration, politics, fashion and people!
Why Yes!
Beauty and Youth:
‘Be proud of your looks but never depend on them.’
‘The sting of reality is that douche bags, bitches and Republicans are usually hot…the caress of karma is that they NEVER age well.’
‘When it comes to looks, don’t compare yourself to those much younger than you. When it comes to success, don’t compare yourself to those much older than you.’
‘Doesn’t matter what you look like, if you think you are absolutely gorgeous….the world will eventually begin to think the same too.’
‘You would be a fool not to use your beauty and your youth to get where you want. You would be a bigger fool if you relied on them to keep you there.’
Work:
‘If your boss is attracted to you, never sleep with him but definitely do keep giving him plenty of reasons to fanaticize about you. The former may get you what you want but the latter ensures that you keep getting what you want!’
‘Try never to use the BCC option in work emails. Its all well and good until the BCC replies all!’
‘The only thing worse than not going on vacation, is coming back from a vacation.’
Immigration:
‘The saying “America is a land of opportunity” is definitely missing the word hardships somewhere in there.’
‘There are two types of immigrants; the young and the old. The young barely notice the hardships because they excitedly wait for the future. The old detest the hardships because to them, this is their future.’
‘The future never stops…today or tomorrow. Look forward to it!’
Worldviews:
‘The US is suffering from a low economy, Pakistan is suffering from a low-life.’
‘For a city reputed to be the most romantic in the world, Parisians act like they haven’t been laid in years.’
‘Goths and Desis have one thing in common, they only feel dressed up when they wear all-black!”
‘Paris is no longer in fashion!’
‘Some people think they’re smarter than the rest because they discuss world politics instead of watching Bollywood films. But, aren’t they both about wealth, greed, sex, good acting, fictitious happy endings and oh the key players are only there because of Nepotism. Kapoors, Bhuttos, Bush – all examples of ‘democracy’!’
Travelling:
‘When it comes to traveling, the way I see it, you should always spend the least on lodging and transportation. Does it really matter how you get there as long as you get there at the time you want. And does it really matter what luxuries a room comes with, when you’re only going to spend unconscious hours of sleep there. Airplane seats and hotel beds, feel the same all over the world. Save your money for the world outside your hotel room.’
Fashion
‘Just because it was expensive doesn’t mean it isn’t cheap.’
People:
‘People who claim to be open books are rarely ever talking about the first, unedited draft.’
‘When people treat you wrong; don’t blame them, blame yourself instead. Why, because you can’t change people but you CAN change yourself. Change yourself to a person who won’t be wronged again.’
Friendships
‘If you don’t tell a friend how you truly feel, you’re not a good friend. If you tell them in front of others present in the room, you’re a worse friend. If you tell another person instead of telling that friend, I’m amazed you have any friends at all.’
‘Give advice to friends who complain about their “terrible” boyfriends/girlfriends only once. If they are still with them the next time you meet…they must not be that “terrible” after all.’
You:
‘Don’t beat yourself over it, you can never say the right thing, to the right person, at the right time. As long as you get you can get two out of three, you’re good to go.’
‘There comes those days in everyone’s lives when nothing is going well…everyone is upset at you…and you feel like utter crap. I guess that’s when its most important to remember that there comes those days in everyone’s lives when nothing is going well…everyone is upset at you…and you feel like utter crap.’
New York City
‘These days too many people are worried about how to become New Yorkers. Here is a tip, the minute you stop worrying about that…is when you become a true New Yorker.’
‘New York is a city for people to be themselves…not to be Carrie, Samantha, Miranda or Charlotte.’
‘Only in New York City do people often begin their sentences with “Only in New York City”!’
‘Americans never really outlive their high school experience! There is always still a popular crowd, looks and money are still just as important and even after several years, many will spend their lives trying to outshine and defeat bullies they may never run into again.’
Sex & Love:
‘I have done enough research to validate that gorgeous men who are very down to earth, usually have a small penis! Just saying!’
‘Look around you, everyone has fallen in love once, have had their heartbroken at least once, and masturbated…at least once. See, we all do have more in common with each other than we thought. Make love not war!’
‘The married sometimes envy the single, the single sometimes envy the married.’
‘In every relationship one is always more invested than the other. But be careful, the roles can be reversed.’
‘One of the worst chronic pains…is that of a broken heart. If you think this is cheesy you have obviously never suffered through one yourself.’
Hi Tech
‘Technology is great but consider yourself lucky if you went to college when there were no camera phones, youtube and facebook!’
‘The funnest Saturday nights are the ones you spend most of your Sunday afternoon untagging on facebook!’
And last but not least…
‘Advice is definitely therapeutic. But more so for the person giving it than the one receiving it.’
